If you pay attention to Facebook and follow pages like Buzz Feed or Thought Catalog, you may know about the recent topics of sexual harassment and the move for more awareness about it.
To be honest, I didn’t think much about sexual harassment since it has never happened to me. I figured with who I am as a person that it was a deterrent and the reason why it hasn’t happened to me. In a way, I was participating in ‘blaming the victim’ with my mindset. I more or less equated what type of friends the person had and who the person was for what sets up sexual harassment. I never thought it was as common as everyone stated it was. That is until it happened to me.
I was hanging out with my best friend and some of her friends at this sort of bar place in my hometown while on spring break. I went to head home for the night and saying goodbyes to the new people I had just met, it was then that it happened. My butt had been groped. I was too shocked to turn around and do anything. I’m ashamed of how I just ignored it and continued on my way in leaving the place to head home instead of turning around and giving the guy a piece of my mind. I was just too shocked, and really tired, to scold the perpetrator or do anything about it.
I felt really violated and it was hard for me to process that I had just experienced sexual harassment. I couldn’t blame it on what I was wearing though. I was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, and nothing tempting was showing. That is unless you consider seeing a girl’s arms tempting. However, I’m pretty sure only a few people would be majorly turned on by seeing a female arm.
What that man had done was something I wouldn’t even allow my ex-boyfriend to do. Therefore, you can probably understand why I felt so violated.
The next day I realized I should be able to feel safe in what I wear and if I look cute. I shouldn’t have to fear that someone is going to touch me without my permission. Sexual harassment just hit home for me. It was brought to the forefront as a problem people face and how common it is. There is no arguing that sexual harassment is wrong. It’s no laughing matter either, but that may be what some people get as a response when they scold the person who violated them. The response of laughing though, says a lot about the way the person views others he is attracted to.
I feel like the overall problem nowadays is people just view others as a means to an end. They view others like an object. They don’t think of the other person and how they would feel. They just think about what they want and not the feelings of the other person.This is very very wrong. As a lady, I should be able to feel like I can wear nice clothes and not feel worried about if someone is going to sexually harass me just because I look nice that day. I shouldn’t have to feel that dressing like slob is what is going to protect me or keep me safe. I shouldn’t have to feel that looking unattractive will keep peoples hands away. I basically shouldn’t feel that making myself look unattractive is what will give me respect in a person’s eye so they don’t touch me without my permission. That’s what it is, respect. I should be able to look nice and have the same amount of respect to not be sexually harassed. My attractiveness should not diminish someone’s respect of me to the point of forcibly touching me.
I think from now on, I will be a big advocate about sexual harassment. I really want to put a stop to it and help women feel that should be respected. If a woman is continually treated with that kind of nature and mindset, she may not understand how a man is suppose to respect her and love her and not just lust after her for her body. The sad fact is some women settle for men that don’t respect them and them they may think sexual harassment is man letting her know he is interested in her. She may not understand that he not interested in her really, but only in her body. There also may be girls that grow up not understanding the difference between a man who disrespects her and a man who respects her. I feel showing how sexual harassment is wrong and bringing awareness to the problem will be a step in the right direction for help women understand what they deserve and what they don’t deserve.