The Official Commencement of My Catholic Life

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A long journey is coming to an end for me. April 12th I will officially and finally be confirmed into the Catholic Church. This journey has taken almost two years because of circumstances that impeded me from signing up for RCIA a year ago.

In a certain way, it’s kind of a little bitter sweet, because I have had so much anticipation and desire for this time to come and it’s finally here. It’s not that I’m having second thoughts about the truth the Catholic Church has, but it’s more or less bitter sweet because I have found these past two semesters I have been so disconnected from God because of my schedule. My schedule this semester itself has been brutal. I have work, 15 credit hours of classes, and an internship. It feels like I’m rushing everywhere and I barely have time to eat or sleep. I am actually now around 20 pounds under weight. I have always been kind of underweight, but never by that much. The feeling of sort disconnection from God is what makes it bitter sweet. My prayer life and meditation on scripture has obviously suffered because of my schedule and that is why I feel so disconnected.

Even though, I’m not as connected I feel to God as I was when I started this journey, I still know objectively I made the right decision. I still know that the Catholic Church holds the whole truth that I my soul desires.

This Saturday, I go to my first confession. I’m a little nervous that I won’t say the right thing to priest to let him know my confession is not a usual confession. I’m can’t wait though for the priest to say I am forgiven. He is a stand in for Christ and it is Jesus saying he has forgiven me. That is something that means a lot to me. As a little girl, I use to doubt my sins were forgiven when I would pray about them because I wasn’t sure how you knew God really forgave your sins. I was more or less thinking of God in human terms and how some people don’t give forgiveness, but all the same you can see how beautiful it is to hear that your sins are forgiven. How beautiful it is to have those words spoken to you and knowing that you are now cleansed from the filth that covered you. It’s also very beautiful how one will receive graces for what they have confessed and these graces are help from Jesus to resist those sins and to stay on the narrow path that leads to eternal life. The sacrament of confession is really such a beautiful sacrament.

April 12th though, I will receive the most beautiful sacrament of all. I will receive the Eucharistic. This is something I will forever treasure. I honestly can’t wait to receive the Eucharist. I can only imagine what it will be like to finally receive Jesus body and soul in the Eucharist.

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Sexual Harassment

If you pay attention to Facebook and follow pages like Buzz Feed or Thought Catalog, you may know about the recent topics of sexual harassment and the move for more awareness about it.

To be honest, I didn’t think much about sexual harassment since it has never happened to me. I figured with who I am as a person that it was a deterrent and the reason why it hasn’t happened to me. In a way, I was participating in ‘blaming the victim’ with my mindset. I more or less equated what type of friends the person had and who the person was for what sets up sexual harassment. I never thought it was as common as everyone stated it was. That is until it happened to me.

I was hanging out with my best friend and some of her friends at this sort of bar place in my hometown while on spring break. I went to head home for the night and saying goodbyes to the new people I had just met, it was then that it happened. My butt had been groped. I was too shocked to turn around and do anything. I’m ashamed of how I just ignored it and continued on my way in leaving the place to head home instead of turning around and giving the guy a piece of my mind. I was just too shocked, and really tired, to scold the perpetrator or do anything about it.

I felt really violated and it was hard for me to process that I had just experienced sexual harassment. I couldn’t blame it on what I was wearing though. I was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, and nothing tempting was showing. That is unless you consider seeing a girl’s arms tempting. However, I’m pretty sure only a few people would be majorly turned on by seeing a female arm.

What that man had done was something I wouldn’t even allow my ex-boyfriend to do. Therefore, you can probably understand why I felt so violated.

The next day I realized I should be able to feel safe in what I wear and if I look cute. I shouldn’t have to fear that someone is going to touch me without my permission. Sexual harassment just hit home for me. It was brought to the forefront as a problem people face and how common it is. There is no arguing that sexual harassment is wrong. It’s no laughing matter either, but that may be what some people get as a response when they scold the person who violated them. The response of laughing though, says a lot about the way the person views others he is attracted to.

I feel like the overall problem nowadays is people just view others as a means to an end. They view others like an object. They don’t think of the other person and how they would feel. They just think about what they want and not the feelings of the other person.This is very very wrong. As a lady, I should be able to feel like I can wear nice clothes and not feel worried about if someone is going to sexually harass me just because I look nice that day. I shouldn’t have to feel that dressing like slob is what is going to protect me or keep me safe. I shouldn’t have to feel that looking unattractive will keep peoples hands away. I basically shouldn’t feel that making myself look unattractive is what will give me respect in a person’s eye so they don’t touch me without my permission. That’s what it is, respect. I should be able to look nice and have the same amount of respect to not be sexually harassed. My attractiveness should not diminish someone’s respect of me to the point of forcibly touching me.

I think from now on, I will be a big advocate about sexual harassment. I really want to put a stop to it and help women feel that should be respected. If a woman is continually treated with that kind of nature and mindset, she may not understand how a man is suppose to respect her and love her and not just lust after her for her body. The sad fact is some women settle for men that don’t respect them and them they may think sexual harassment is man letting her know he is interested in her. She may not understand that he not interested in her really, but only in her body. There also may be girls that grow up not understanding the difference between a man who disrespects her and a man who respects her. I feel showing how sexual harassment is wrong and bringing awareness to the problem will be a step in the right direction for help women understand what they deserve and what they don’t deserve.

The Art of Compassion: How to Care for Someone With Depression

The Ugly Truth

I’m going to take a break from the school assignments and the documentation of the publishing process in order to write something that will be infinitely more important than either of those.

I’m going to talk about depression.

If you had a knee-jerk reaction of feeling uncomfortable, good–you probably should. Depression isn’t supposed to be a feel good topic. I want you to hold onto that discomfort. Sit with it. Let it fill you up. As a human being, depression is something you’ll encounter in your life, either in yourself or in someone you care about. Yes, it’s unsettling, but by holding that nervous energy now, maybe you can learn how better to make it more comfortable.

I’ve struggled with depression ever since middle school. It’s something that lives inside of me, and to a great extent, it will never truly leave me. I have bad days. Sometimes I have…

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Christian Creeds

First before I begin going into the content and subject matter of this post, I wanted to apologize for being away for so long and not posting in a while. My computer has had two hard drives go bad and need to be replaced and I also couldn’t seem to remember my password until today. I also have been very busy with my college schoolwork, work, and my internship. I hope to post more often though about a variety of topics I have in mind and I hope you will be on the look out.

In my study of the Catholic faith, one of the things I have learned is they have writings from the 4th century AD from early Christians and these early Christians and their writings can be read by someone if they really want to. You can purchase translations in English on Amazon. It is easily available to read. The Catholic Faith really goes into the historical side of Christianity. I grew up as a protestant, I will be confirmed into the Catholic Church after Easter this year, and these figures or even the idea of looking at historical Christian figures after the apostles was not something ever brought up or thought of. In my background, we only viewed the bible as something to be studied. However, I don’t believe the Sola Scriptura doctrine to be correct or even biblical, and therefore on my discovery of this and other doctrinal concepts leaning towards the Catholic Church I decided to become Catholic. The historical way things are explained outside the bible really helped me get a good picture of the context of what was going on at the time and how Christianity developed, mature, and grew into what it is today.

In my Christology class, we are studying the heresies of the patristic period, and why the creeds such as the Nicene creed and the Apostles’ creed are important. In itself, learning the heresies has helped me better formulate my own ideas of the Trinity and the Incarnation. In class we looked at Arianism, Orgenism, Nestorianism, and many other heresies that arose in Christianity way before the Protestant Reformation. These heresies helped the Church define what they believed by these questions coming up and conflicts happening. The Church had to take theological position on the internal conflict and debates that were arising and state who was correct in understanding the Trinity, the problem of evil, the Incarnation, and other things. There arose councils to decide on these matters. An example of this is the Nicene creed, it was made to state the church did not believe what Arius was teaching. It was made to specifically state Jesus and God the Father were equal to each other, and not what Arius claimed which was Jesus was less than the father.

The reason I bring this up is because for my Christology class I will be writing a paper on the Apostles’ Creed. The Apostle’s  Creed states:

I believe in God, the Father almighty,

Creator of heaven and earth,

and in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord,

who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary,

suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried;

he descended into hell; on the third day he rose again from the dead;

he ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty;

from there he will come to judge the living and the dead.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,

the holy catholic Church,

the communion of saints,

the forgiveness of sins,

the resurrection of the body,

and life everlasting.

Amen.

The part I’m focusing on in the creed is the phrase “he descended into hell.” I’m already learning so much with just the few resources I have used to research the topic so far. I have found some books don’t cover the topic at all even though the book is solely on the topic of the Apostles creed and even a book by Ratzinger, aka Pope Benedict XVI, from what I understand compares this phrase to God being silent or mute. He states, “the article about the Lord’s descent into hell reminds us that not only God’s speech but also his silence is part of Christian revelation (Ratzinger 225).” He also puts forward many ideas on how it can be interpreted and even mentions the traditional way it is viewed (Ratzinger 223-230). He seems to suggest in his view at the end of the section he believes in the traditional view. This view states Jesus descended to open the gates for the people who died before Christ and have them finally enter heaven.

This post I feel was very much of a ramble, but I hope you enjoyed it.

Work Cited:
Ratzinger, J. Introduction to Christianity. New York: Herder and Herder, 1969. Print.

Understanding Depression

Sunshine Spoils Milk

“Ugh, I’m so depressed today.”

If I hear this statement one more time I think I’m going to scream…

Truth be told, I do not know whether the person saying this is or is not suffering from depression. (In fact, I do not know who this person is, since this ambiguous, blanket statement has been said by many people I’ve met over the years.) However, I do know is that statements like this are why depression—the illness—is often confused as more of a mood than a clinical issue.

So in an effort to educate (and not simply scream), I decided to take today’s blog “back to basics.”

Depression, by definition, is “a serious medical condition in which a person feels very sad, hopeless, and unimportant and often is unable to live in a normal way” (Merriam-Webster). While I also acknowledge it is “a state of feeling sad,” and that the aforementioned…

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It’s okay – just be sad

Painted Heart Diaries

I just love this. I’m realising how important it is to give myself permission to feel what I feel and just “sit” with my emotions. It takes at long as it takes…you don’t owe anyone a performance.

“It’s okay to be sad. You don’t owe anyone a performance of being okay when you feel like you’re falling apart. It isn’t your job to smile or hide your truth to make other people feel more comfortable. If it gets awkward, let it be awkward.

If people try to silence your pain by telling you to get over it and cheer up because you’re no longer fun or you’re ruining the mood, you don’t have to push away your sadness. You have to honor your feelings and trust that you don’t need anyone’s permission or approval to feel what you feel. You don’t ever have to sacrifice your self care for the sake…

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