People nowadays seem to think believing in something and arguing that belief makes you a “bitch.” What makes a person a “bitch” is when they argue something they believe is when they use attacks and instead of argument and logic. When they use name calling and let their anger control them. That is when someone is a “bitch.” A person who stands for what they believe, but does so in a reasonable way and without hate sowed into their argument is not a “bitch.”
However, nowadays the more I think about it what people seem to think of as a “bitch” is someone who is blunt and is blunt about confronting a problem. Confrontation is not a bad thing. When I was suffering with my episode of depression, I would have to confront my friends about the distortions my mind was telling me. Usually, I would have liked to do this in private with the person, however it was rare for such an occurrence to happen. Therefore, I would have to ask them through text, because it was the only way to privately talk about this. At its worse, when I was really desperate and the person had a nag for not texting back I would contact their best friend and ask if so and so hated me. The Confrontations did help clear up and give me clarity on what was lies and what was actually reality. This, in a way, eventually made me braver about confrontation itself, especially among friends.
It should be noted though, my system of adapting to my perceptions of my mental illness more than likely made things awkward between me and my friends. Well, not all of my friends because some understood my brain wasn’t working. It was probably very bothersome to them because they probably thought I was attention seeking, but I wasn’t. I was trying to figure out what was truly going on. It’s understandable my friends who had not known me for years would find it awkward because they didn’t know what normality was for me.
The reason I came to be so confrontational at times is because I would express my thoughts to my therapist and she would emphasize communication. In a way, I may have hyper focused on communication and become to brutally honest. Then throw in the distortions, being ignored, and the irritability of depression and maybe I had an excuse. However, in my mind that does not excuse my behavior for being grumpy with my friends. Moving on to my point, there has to be difference between honesty and being brutally honest, but I think in some situations it’s hard to find the right words that will turn brutal honesty into gentle honesty.
I will acknowledge talking in face to face where voice tone and facial expression is able to enhance meaning, though it’s not always possible to talk face to face. With the ease of texting and calling, wording things can be very crucial. However, this is a skill more often than not is something people lack. Myself included. Therefore, perhaps communication has become more necessary in the world of texting. If you can’t understand the tone of the person’s text message than ask about it. It is worse to assume the tone is negative when it is not meant to be than to just ask. In addition, with the innovation of emoticons the tone of a text message can be clearer. Therefore, it is a good way to show the right interpretation of a text. Everyone has busy lives and with texting a person is allowed to have time to sort out things and go about their busy schedule. It also allows for them to have time to think of a good response to something and not have speak words from their shocked state.
Moving on from that, whether you confront someone face to face or through texting, my overall point is confrontations is not a bad thing. It can help a person grow, solve problems, and give clear communication between individuals. Confrontation may entail brutal honesty, but from what I have learned from my experience with clinical depression I would rather have someone hurt me with the truth than kiss me with a lie.